7.2.16

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I think I’ve forgotten how to cry. These days it often feels like I’m on the verge of crying – that pressure behind the eyes building, tears glistening just enough to moisten and, occasionally for a single tear (or two) to escape – mostly unnoticed as I try to hide (them). *he is here, and […]

7-1-16

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i read over my post from yesterday. i’m not calm, cool or collected. and you know what? i’m becoming more and more ok with this, with being not ok. i didn’t ask to be gaslight, emotionally, verbally, physically and spiritually abused as a child. i didn’t ask to have unresolved childhood trauma inflict the wounds […]

6.30.16

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trauma can fuck off now seriously. i’ve got a wedding to plan (in less than two months now for Christs sake!), a studio to finish building and then design/furnish/move into, a teenager (need i say more?), a house in disarray because us adults have too much going on and between us not enough spoons or […]

6.21.16

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I can’t write. Like literally can.not.write – I’ve been sitting here at the computer for going on an hour with my mind a swirling mess of thoughts, ideas, rants, and dreams. My “Drafts” folder grows slowly. My “Ideas” folder grows faster than I can blink. But I can’t write. I want, I need, nothing more […]

Dear Family

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Dear Family of Birth, You taught me many, many things… The things I most needed to learn: that I am and always will be loved unconditionally, that I’m beautiful and brave and you are proud of my voice and passion and energy, that I am worthy of compassion… Sadly, you did not teach me those […]

Dear Rest

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Dear Rest, I need more of you than is ‘normal’, more than ‘healthy’ bodies do. I’ve spent a lot of the past nearly two years resisting this truth. I want to go.go.go — I want to create and connect and craft. I know it’s ok that I want this so much. What I’ve finally been […]

Dear Intuition

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Dear Intuition, You are the keeper of my connection to Divine inner knowingness. You are never, not ever, wrong – though you’ve often been doubted. Time has always proven you knew best all along. You are always with me, you are always with me. I am sorry Please forgive me I love you Thank you […]

Dear Morning,

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Dear Morning, Our relationship has changed so many times. Sometimes I imagine you must find me to be capricious and, perhaps, a bit untrustworthy. I hope not. My heart is sincere, you’ve always been my favorite time of day. I have fond memories of the years when I’d get up before the children and sit […]

Dear Feet,

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Dear Feet, You never liked being confined in shoes. Especially not ‘special’ shoes that had to be kept clean – what fun is that?!? Oh how you must have hated those god-awful ‘corrective’ shoes mother put you in when we were young! I know I hated them. And then, as soon as her back would […]